Site icon Desi Kahani

Do Number Ka Badmash – Part I

Ye chuten, gaand aur land sab kaam dev ke haatho ki katputliyan hai, kon si chut aur gaand kis land se kab kaha aur kitni der chudegi koi nahi janta! – is kahani se! bachpane se jab bhi jiro ke barish hoti ya jor ki bijali kadakti thi to main darr ke ke maare ghar me dubak jaya karta tha, par use raat ki barish ne mujhe romanch se labalab bhar diya tha aaj bhi jiro ki barish hoti hai aur bijali kadakti hai to mujhe ek sher yaad aa jata hai !! E khuda itna na baras ki wo aa na paye ! aane ke baad itna na baras ki wo ja na paye !! june mahine ke aakhri din chal rahe the aur madhu (meri patni) garamiyon ki chhutiyon me apne maike gayi hui thi, main akela drawing room me khidki ke pass betha makki ke baare me soch raha tha (makki mere sale ki ladki hai) pichhle saal wo ek sadak durghatna ka shikar ho gayi thi aur hame rota-bikakhta chhod kar chali gayi thi, sach pucho to pichhle ek-dedh saal me koi bhi din aisa nahi bita hoga ki maine makki ko yaad na kiya ho.

Wo to mera jese sab kuch loot kar hi le gayi thi aur main wahi uski panty aur reshmi rumal hath me liye betha uski yaad me aansu baha raha tha, har aahat par main chonk sa jata aur lagta ki jese makki hi aa gayi hai, !! darwaje par jab koi bhi ahat si hot hai to lagta hai ki tum aayi ho ! taaro bhari raat me jab koi jugnu chamakta hai lagta hai tum aayi ho ! umas bhari garmi me jab purwa ka jhonka aata hai to lagta hai tum aayi ho ! dur kahi amraiyi me jab bhi koi koyal kukti hai lagta hai ki tum aayi ho !! us din raviwaar tha main sara din ghar par hi raha, pehle din jo bajar se blue filmo ki 4-5 cd laya tha unhe computer me copy kiya tha aur ek do film dekhi bhi par makki ki yaad aate hi maine computer band kar diya, din me garmi itni jada thi ki aag hi baras rahi thi, raat ke koi 10 baje honge ki achanak mosam badla aur jiro ki aandhi ke sath halki barish shuru ho gayi aur hawa ke ek thande jhonke ne jese mujhe sehla sa diya.

Fir achanak call bell baji aur lagbhag darwaja pitte hue koi bola “didi..!! jiju.. !! darwaja jaldi kholo.. didi..!!!?” kisi ladki ki aawaj thi, makki jesi aawaj sunkar main jese apne khyalon se jaga ki is samye ko aa sakta hai? maine rumal aur panty jeb me dali aur jese hi darwaje ki aur badha, ek jhatke ke sath darwaja khul gaya aur koi mujhse jor se takraya, shayad chitkani khuli reh gayi thi to darwaja pitne aur jor lagane se apne aap khul gaya aur hadbdahat me wo mujhse takra gayi, agar maine use bah se nahithama hota wo jarur gir padti aur aapa -dhapi me uske kamdhe se latka bag (laptop wala) niche hi gir gaya, wo chikhti hui mujhse jor se lipat si gayi aur uske badan se aati pasine barish aur jawan jism ki khushboo se mera tann mann sab sarabor hota chala gaya, uske chhote chhote uroj mere sine se sate hue the aur wo roye ja rahi thi, main hakka bakka reh gaya kuch samajh hi nahi paya.

Aur koi 2-3 mint ke baad mere muh se nikla “k k kon.. arre.. n n n.. ni.. nisha tu..??? kay baat hai.. arre kya hua.. yum itni dari hui kyo ho..?” ohh ye to madhu ki cousin nishsa thi kabhi kabhar apni nokari ke silsile me yaha aaya karti thi aur raat ko yaha theher jaati thi, pehle maine is chidiya par dhyan nahi diya tha, aap soch rahe honge ki itni mast hasin londiya aur mera dhyan pehle kyo nahi gaya, iske do kaaran the ek to wo sardiyon me ek do baar aayi thi to wo kapdon se ladi fudi thi, dusra uski aankho par mota sa chashma par aaj to wo kamal lag rahi thi, usne contect lens lagwa liye the kandho ke upar tak baal kate hue the kaano me sone ki patli baaliyan, jeans pent me kase nitambh aur khule top se jhalakte kandhari anar to keher hi dha rahe the saali apne aap ki jhansi ki roshni kehti hai par lagti hai nenitaal ya almoda ki pahadi billi, “ohh.. sorry jiju.. madhu didi kaha hai?.. didi.. didi..” nisha mujhse pare hatte hue idhar udhar dekhte hue boli.

Main “ohh didi ko chhodo pehle ye batao tum itni raat gaye barish me dari hui.. kya baat hai..??” wo boli “wo.. wo ek kutta..” main “haan haan kya hua? tum thik ho?” nisha abhi bhi dari hui khadi thi uske mujh se kuchh nahi nikal raha tha to maine darwaja band kiya aur uska hath pakad kar sofe par bithaya aur fir puchha “kya baat ha? tum ro kyo rahi thi??” jab uski saans kuch samanye hui to fir wo boli “dar asal saari musibat aaj hi aani thi pehle to presentation me hi der ho gayi thi aur fir khana khane ke chakkar me 2 baj gaye car bhi aaj hi khrab honi thi, bus stand gayi to agara ki bus bhi chhut gayi” shayad in dino uski posting agra me thi, main itna to janta tha ki wo kisi dawa banane wali company me kaam karti hai aur marketing ke silsile kai jagha aati jaati rehti hai, par is tarah dare hue rote hue hadbada kar aane ka karan meri samajh me nahi aaya.

Maine savaliya nigahon se use dekha to usne bataya “vastav me maharaja hotel me hamari company ka ek presentation tha saare medical representative aaye hue the hamare do naye utpad bhi lanch kiye gaye the confrence 9 baje khatam hui aur khana khane ke chakkar me der ho gayi aur wapas ghar jaane ka sadhan nahi thi to yaha aate wakt raste me auto khrab ho gaya aur is barish ko bhi aaj hi aana tha, raste me ek ghar ke samne kutta soya tha aur bekhyali me mera pair uspar pad gaya aur wo itni jor se bhonka ki main darr gayi” ek saans me nisha ne sab bata diya, main “arre kahi kat to nahi liya??” wo boli “nahi kata to nahi..! didi dikhayi nahi de rahi?” main “ohh.. madhu to jaipur gayi hui hai pichhle 10 dino se!” to wo boli “tabhi unka mobile nahi mil raha tha” main “to mujhe hi kar liya hota” wo boli “mere pass apka number nahi tha” main “haan bhai.. aap hamara number kyo rakhengi.. hum apke hai hi kon?” wo boli “aap aisa kyo kehte hai?”.

Main “bhai tum to didi ke liye hi aati ho hame kon puchhta hai?” eo boli “nahi aisi koi baat nahi hai!” main “iska matlab tum mere liye bhi aati ho” main bhala mazak ka aisa moka kese chhodta, wo sharma gayi aur usne apni nigahe niche kar li, thodi der sochti rahi aur fir boli “ohh didi to hai nahi to main kisi hotel me theher jaati hoon!!” main “kyo? yaha kya dikkat hai?” wo boli “wo.. wo.. aap akele hai main.. mera matlab.. didi ko pata chalega to kya sochegi?” main “kyo kya sochegi? tum isse pehle yaha nahi thehri?” wo boli “haan par us samye didi ghar thi!” main “kya hum itne ure hai?” wo boli “ohh.. wo baat nahi hai” main “to fir kya baat hai?” wo boli “wo.. wo.. mera matlab kya hai ki ek jawan ladki ka is tarahger mard ke saath raat me.. akele?? mera matlab?? wo kuch samajh nahi aa raha” usne roni si surat banare hue kaha, main “ohh. ab main samjha tum mujhe ger samajhti hoya fir tumhe apne aap par vishwas nahi hai” wo boli “nahi aisi baat to nahi hai”.

Main “to fir baat ye hai ki main ek hinsak pashu hoon ek gunda-badmash mawali hoon aur tum jese ladki ko akeli pakar kha hi jaunga ya kuch ulta sidha kar bethunga? kyo ha na sahi baat?” wo boli “ohh jiju.. aap bhi baat ka batangad bana rahe hai main to ye keh rahi thi ki apko bekar me pareshani hogi” main “arre isme pareshani wali kya baat hai?” wo boli “fir main bhi ekta kapur.. mera matlab wo.. didi..?” wo kuch sochte hue boli!, main “arre jab tumhe koi smasya nahi mujhe nahi to fir jaipur bethi madhu ko kya samasya ho sakti hai, aur fir aas pados wale se koi fikar nahi karte agar apna mann saaf hai to fir kisi ka kya darr? kya main galat keh raha hoon” main itna badhiya moka aur hath me aayi murgi aise hi hawa me kese ud jane deta, mujhe to laga jese makki hi mere pass sofe par bethi hai! wahi naak-naksh wahi roop-rang aur kad-kathi wahi aawaj wahi najuk sa badan bilkul chhui mui si kachi kali jesi.

Bas dono me farak itna tha ki nisha ki aankhe kaali hai aur makki ki bilori thi aur dusra nisha koi 24-25 ki hogi jabki makki 13 ki thi, makki thodi si gadrayi hui lagti thi jab nisha dubli patli chaarhari lagti hai aur kamar to aisi ki dono muthiyon me sama jaye aur chhote chohte ras-kup (uroj) honth itne surkh laal aur mote mote hai to uske nichale honth mera matlab hai ki uski chut ke honth kese honge, main to soch kar hi romanchit ho utha aur mera pappu to chhalange hi lagane laga, uske hontho ke dahane (chodaai) to 2.5-3 inch ka hi hoga ling mahadev agar aaj ye chidiya fas gayi to meri to lotry hi lag jayegi aur agar aisa ho gaya to kal somwaar ko main jarur jal aur doodh tumhe chadhaunga bhale hi mujhe ka chhuti kyo na leni pade! pakka wada! prem aashram wale guru ji ne apne pichhle parwachan me sach hi farmaya tha “ye sab chuten, gaand aur land sab kaam dev ke haatho ki katputliyan hai, kon si chut aur gaand kis land se kab kaha aur kitni der chudegi koi nahi janta!”.

Itne me jiro ki bijli kadki aur musladhar barish shuru ho gayi! nisha darr ke maare meri aur sarak gayi, mujhe ek sher yaad aa gaya !! lipat jaate hai wo bijli ke darr se ! ya ilahi ye ghanta do ghanta to barse !! uske bhige badan ki khushboo se main to madhosh hua ja raha tha aur gile kapdon ke uska ang ang saaf dikhayi de raha tha, shayad usne mujhe ghurte hue dekh liya tha to wo kuch sochte hue boli “main to puri hi bhig gayi”, main samjh gaya ki wo kapde badalna ya nahana chahti hai par uske pass kapde nahi hai, mere se kapde mangte hue shayad kuch sankoch kar rahi hai to maine usse kaha “koi baat nahi tum naha lo main madhu ki saree nikal deta hoon” wo fir sochne lagi “par wo.. wo.. saree to mujhe bandhani nahi aati” to maine mann me kaha “meri jaan tum to bina saree-kapdon ke hi achhi lagogi tumhe kapde kon kambakht pehnana chahta hai” “koi baat nahi koi pent aur top shirt ya nighty bhi hai aao mere sath”.

Maine uski bah pakdi aur apne bedroom ki taraf lejane laga , aahhh uski naram najuk bahen makhmali jesi mulayam aur chikni thi aur agar bahe aisi hai to fir janghe kesi hongi?, kapdon ke almari to sadiyon se ladi padi thi par ek khane me pent shirt aur top aadi bhi the, to maine unki aur ishara kar diya, nisha ne kaha “par meri kamar to 22 ki hai madhu didi ki pent mujhe dhili rahegi” “ohh.. achha koi baat nahi mere pass ek dress aur hai tumhe puri aani chahiye aao mere sath” mainee almari band kar di aur dusri almari ki aur le jakar use gulabi rang ki ek nayi bel-batam aur rang ka top jis par pile fool bane the dikhaya aur sath hi ek jodi bra aur panty bhi di, ye makki ke pichhle janamdin par madhu se chhupa kar kharide the par use de nahi paya tha, to unhe dekh kar nisha ne kaha “lagta hai ye to aa jayenge” usne panty uthayi aur gor se dekhte hue boli “ohh.. didi bhi aisi hi bra behnti hai? ye.. to.. ye.. to ohh?” wo aage kuch nahi bol payi.

Be-khyali me uske muh se nikal to gaya par uska matlab jaan kar wo sharma gayi, ssiiii.. mujhe to aisa laga ki jese kisi ne makki ko hi mere samne khada kar diya hai bas naam ka hi fark hai, makki ki tarah sharmane ki is jaan lewa aada ko to main zindagi bhar nahi bhul paunga, na jaane usne kya soch kar bra aur panty wahi rakh di aur mera dil to chhlange hi lagane laga, ya allah.. bina bra aur panty me to ye bilkul makki ki tarah kayamat lagegi, main apne aap par kaabu kese rakh pauga mujhe to darr lagne laga ki kahi main uska balatkaar hi naa kar bethun aur mera pappu to jese kutumbminar hi ban gaya tha, itni uttejna to aaj se pehle kabhi mehsus nahi hui thi pappu to ideal tattu ban gaya tha, fir achanak mere kaano me nisha ki mithi aawaj padi, wo boli “oo jiju main nahane ja rahi hoon” “haan haan toliya aur shempoo aadi bathroom me hi hai” main to jese khyalon se jaga.

Nisha bathroom me ghus gayi aur mera dil jor-jor se dhdak raha tha, bahar joro ki barish aur mere andar jalti aag dono ki raftaar ek hi jesi to thi, fir achanak mere dimag me ek khayal dod gaya aur hontho par ek rehesyemayi muskaan aa gayi aur uske sath hi mere kadam bathrook ki aur badne lage, ab aap itne kam akal to nahi hai ki aap meri yojna na samjhe ho! maine key hole se bathroom ke andar jhanka, nisha ne apni pent aur shirt utaar di thi aur ab wo sirf bra aur panty me thi uff.. kya mast hirni jesi gori-chitti najuk kaamsin kali ki tarah jese makki hi mer aankhon ke samne khadi ho, surahidaar gardan patli si kamar maano limca ki botal ko ek joda hath aur peir laga diye ho, sangmarmar sa tarasha hua safak badan jispar kisi farishte ka bhi mann dol jaye aur ek khas baat kankh (jaha se baaju shuru hoti hai) aur urojo se thoda upar ka bhag aise bana tha jese ki gori-chitti chut hi bani hai.

Aisi ladkiyan wakayi najuk hoti hai aur unki asali chut bhi aisi hi hoti hai chhoti si tikon aakar ki dibbi jitni badi, agar apne priyanka chopra ya kareena kapoor kisi film me bina bahon ke blause ke dekha ho to apki meri is baat ki sachayi ka andaja ho jayega, fir mera dhyan uski kamar par gaya jo 22 inch se jada to hargij nahi ho sakti patli patli gori gulabi jhanghe aur do inch ki patti wali wahi t-aakar ki panty (jo madhu ki pasndida hai) uske bahar jhantho ke chhote chhote mulayam roye jese baal, hey bhagwaan main to jese pagal hi ho jaunga aur mujhe to lagne laga ki main abhi bathroom ka darwaja tod kar andar ghus jaun aur.. aur..!!, nisha ne bade naaj-o-andaj se apni bra ke hook khole aur dono kabutar jese aazad ho gaye, ghor gulabi do sindhuri aam jese ras se bhare hue ho aur chuchiyon ka gehra ghera keram ki goti jitna bada bilkul churut laal, ghundiyan to bas chane ke daane jitne surkh anar ke daane jese pencil ki nok ke tarah tikhe.

Usne ada se apne urojon par hath fera aur ek daane ko pakad kar muh ki taraf kiya aur us par jeebhi laga di, ya allah.. mujhe laga ki jese ab kayamat hi aa jayegi! usne shishe ke samne ghum kar apne nitambh dekhe jese do punam ke chaand kisi ne bandh diye ho aur unke bich ki darar ek lambi khai ki tarah, panty us darar me ghusi hui thi to isne apne nitambho par halki si chapat lagayi aur fir dono hatho ko kamar ki aur le jakar apni kaali panty niche sarkani shuru kar di, mujhe laga ki agar maine apni nigahe waha se nahi hatayi to aaj tarur mera hart fell ho jayega, jese hi panti niche sarki halke-halke makke ke bhutte ke baalon jese reshmi naram chhote chhote roye jese baal najar aane lage, uske baad do bahgo me bante mote-mote bahari honth gulabi ratan liye hue, chira to mere andaje ke mutabik 3 inch se to katayi jada nahi tha aur andar ke honth badami rang ke lagta hai saali ne abhi tak chut se sirf mutne ka hi kaam liya hai aur koi ungali baaji bhi lagta hai nahi ki hogi.

Andar ke honth bilkul chipke hue aur kishmish ka daana to bas moti ki tarah chamak raha tha, gaand ka chhed to najar hi nahi aaya par mera andaja hai ki wo bhi bhure rang ka hi hoga, dayi jhangh par ek chhota sa til uff.. kyamat barpata hua! usne shishe me dekhte hue un reshmi baalon wali chut par ek hath fera aur halki si siti bajate hue ek aankh daba di, mera pappu to aise akad gaya jese kisi jarnal ko dekh kara sipahi savdhan ho jata hai aur mujhe to darr lagne lga ki kahi ye bin lade shahid na ho jaye, maine pyaar se use sehlaya par wo mera kaha kyo manne laga! aur fir najakat se wo halke halke paon badhate hue shawar ki aur badh gayi, paani ki fuhar uske gore badan par pet se hoti hui uski chut ke chhote chhote baalon se hoti hui niche gir rahi thi jese wo peshab kar rahi ho, main to muh dabaye dekhta hi reh gaya! wo gaati ja rahi thi “paani me mera gora badan..”.

Main soch raha tha ki aaj ise thanda main kar hi dunga ghabrao mat, koi 10 mint tak wo faoware ke niche khadi rahi aur fir usne apni chut ko pani se dhoya aur usne apni ungaliyan se apni fanke ghire se chodi ki jese kisi titali ne apne pankh uthaye ho, gulabi rang ki najuk si pankhudiya! kishmish ke daane jitna madan-mani (tint) machis ki tili jitna mutar chhed aur uske ek inch niche sawarg ka dawar chhota sa laal ratnaar, mujhe laga ki main to gash khakar gir hi padunga! fir usne shawar band kar diya aur toliye se apna sharir pochane lagi, jab wo apne nitambh ponch rahi thi to ek hali si jhalak uski naram najuk gaand ke chhed par pad gayi, uff.. kya kayamat chhupa rakhi thi usne! apni bagalen pochane ke liye jab usne apni bahe uthayi to main dekh kar dang reh gaya, kaankh me ek bhi baal nahi bilkul makkhan jese cchikani saaf sunheri gori chitti! ab main use husan kahu bijali kahu patakha kahu ua kayamat.

Arsh malshiyani ka ek sher kahe bina nahi raha ja raha !! bla hai keher hai aafat hai fitna hai kyamat hai ! is hasino ki jawani ko jawani kon kehta hai? !!, ab usne bina bra aur panty ke hi shirt (top) aur batam pehnna chalu kar diya, bel batam pehente samye maine fir ek baar uski chut par najar daali! laal chukandar ki pyaar chut jese makki ka hi dabal rol ho, ab waha rukne ka koi matlab nahi reh gaya tha! hey bhole shankar aaj meri laaj rakh lena kal somwaar hai yaad hai na??? kahani ka agla bhag shighar hi apki najar hoga! dhanyawad! apka prem guru! meri mail id hai “premguru2u@ymail.com”.

Inspired by – Antarvasna

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